I feel like shit.  Allergies = FAIL!!! 

Ugh, I want to diiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeee....................   DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDX 

[/complain] 

Well, at least I'm not going to swim for PE.  I don't think I could handle that right now.  *cries* 

Hello there! I'm single again!

someone please kill me now

I feel like shit, really. Not because I was dumped (I wasn't) but because I broke up with Tony. And I feel bad. DX

I know I shouldn't have said that I'd go out with him even though I had told myself "No more boyfriends! D:<" but I did anyway and then I realised "Oh, shit, what do I do now?". Break up with him, of course. And so I did. And now I feel bad. DDDDX <-all my fault

I feel like pulling my hair out or doing something else equally melodramatic. *flail*

ARGH!!! He just smiled and said something like "I knew this was going to happen/this always happens" and I went all TT__TT and I feel like I was babbling like an idiot and why do I keep on saying like, and, and feel? *sob*
NOTHAPPYNOTHAPPYNOTHAPPYNOTHAPPYNOTHAPPYNOTHAPPYINTHELEASTBITARGHIWANTTOHURTMYSELFORSOMETHING!

"Are we still friends?" *cries* I feel like some evil hideous creature/beast. ;_;

After that I was grinning from ear to ear going "I feel so very lovely! I am so wonderful! SOMEBODY KILL ME NOW!" Donovan was all, No, that's bad! or something. I don't know. He was nice, as usual, and I DID NOT DESERVE IT.

So, yes, I do not have a very high opinion of myself. Oh, bugger. :D <-lookit my smile! It means everything is a-OK!

I can't wait until I feel better so that I can flirt to my heart's content. O_o ...

Does this mean I'm not half as sad/upset as I make myself out to be? Gosh, I feel heartless. (srsly, tho i do)

___________________________________

I saw Ashley(sp?). More on that later!

I have fifteen minutes to dress up in business attire and I finished my speech a few minutes ago.  By eight it should be memorized since the section I'm in does the speech part first. 

Wish me Luck!

ETA:  I didn't make it in time.  I'm going to go wallow in self-pity now... 

Five, apparently.  Coincidentally, about the same amount of AcaDorks are required to fix the ceiling.  A pattern, perhaps?  X3

So, after almost suffering a nervous breakdown (with the crying, almost not being able to breathe thing included free of charge) I actually went to AcaDec today and finally received some help with writing my speech after an eternity of people saying, "Go write a speech!" without bothering to explain what the fuck that entails.  Bitter enough for ya?  ;D

I had fun today!  Currently my favorite people in AcaDec (excluding Rissy) are Bernard, Hector, Paolo, Mariah and this one girl whose name I am not entirely sure of.  XDDD  Yeah, I like friendly people. Theresa is OK I guess, but she's a bit too intense for my liking.  She no play around, I think, so yeah, I feel intimidated.  >_> 

Oh!  My part of the competition is the day after tomorrow!  And speeches, interviews, and impromptus are first for me.  Did I mention the part where I haven't written my speech yet?  No pressure!  *hyperventilates*

Yeah...  No pressure... 

I had a whole bunch more I was going to write about, but eh...  I guess I can do that later, when my sanity isn't involved. 

Later, 
            SL

I'm such a horrible person...  I should be writing my speech that I have to perform today.  I should be typing up my poem. 


Watch me procrastinate. 

"What are you doing messing around on the computer?  I thought you were writing an essay.  If you don't finish in twenty minutes, I'm gonna kick your ass." 

Really, mom, just how immature are you?  How the hell do you expect me to write a fucking essay in under twenty minutes?  Obviously you were smoking crack or something because that is the only logical explanation can come up with for your horrendously inane comment.  Yes, I am wasting some time on the computer because I can't think of anything to write at the moment.  No, I can not possibly finish three body paragraphs and a conclusion in under twenty minutes.   Thank you and good night, Ms. Daughter-dearest-can-you-please-write-my-resumé. 

And to think that Once Upon a Time I thought I had a good relationship with my mother.  *snort*

So, er, I've been neglecting my AcaDec studies for a while--most notably my speech.  I was supposed to write a speech about something involving politics in  some form or another....  *les sigh* 

I'm writing something entirely different now.  As different as can get, come to think of it.  *sighs yet again* 

No longer am I to perform a speech about something vaguely related to politics, but about how being bilingual affects me. 

It's strangely easy to write about, come to think of it, for a topic that I haven't focused all that much on.  All I know is that the second-to-last paragraph is going to be POWERFUL.  (I think...)

Concrit will bring much love.  I need to get this proofed tomorrow...  *looks away*

ugh, i hate my family right now...  DDDDX


Why am I the sane one?  i have a migrane and im on my period, yet they are the ones pmsing. 

I haven't updated in a while, and I'd figured I'd take the chance to do so now even though I should be doing my homework and/or studying like a good little girl.  *dramatic sigh* 

Alas, I am not, which is unfortunate for my "It's a new semester, let's do something productive!" resolutions.  : )

I was a good girl yesterday, though.  I did all of my homework, or at least attempted to complete it and I wrote notes and everything!  But I'm feeling lazy at the moment, which will do wonders for my future grades.  Speaking of grades, I flunked most of my first semester.  The only things I passed were Applied Chemistry and Geometry.  I was only one point away from passing English!  ARGH!  If Miss Rockey had only made the Final worth 20% of our semester grade, I would've gotten at least some credit! 

Too bad for me, though, 'cause I can't be too mad at her since I could see where she was coming from.  Yes, people who are too stupid and/or lazy to do their work shouldn't be able to pass.  I still curse lack of credits, though. 

I'm still pretty much screwed when it comes to graduating, but perhaps through a combination of summer school and night school I can?  Even if it turns out that I don't, then there's always community college, right? As far as I'm concerned, the only definite thing is that I'm getting my masseuse license after I'm through with high school. 

I went to Academic Decathlon all by my lonesome today.  Rissy said she had a headache... 

Oh!  I wrote an essay in under an hour!  That was awesome, though I loathe the essay.  The fact that I actually finished is reason enough to celebrate.  *grin* 

Next:  Learn how to write and perform a speech.  *groan*  Not to mention impromptus and interviews.  DX  I'm not really worried about the tests since if I study a bit I'll do good, and even if I don't study I'm a good guesser.  XDDD 

Well, later!  I'm off to watch the Mexican version of Desperate Housewives.  Yes.  A Mexican version of Desperate Housewives, I kid you not! 

Sooo, I have a crush on the dude that sits next to me during English...  And, yeah, not much to say besides that.  'Course it's a crush that borders slightly as fangirling...  >_< 

It's odd.  I haven't really crushed on anyone in a while now.  Not since last year.  I mean, the only reason I was interested in Anthony was 'cause he told me he liked me...  Ehh... I don't want to be in a relationship anyway.  I don't think I'd make a good girlfriend, I think I'd just end up using them for their body like in my last (and only) "serious" relationship.  Yep.  I use them for their bodies.  >_>;; 

Like Chris.  He was a nice guy I suppose, but I if I'm honest (and I make a point in being honest) I really didn't like him or care about him all that much.  I mean, I liked kissing him and stuff, but other then that nada.  Nothing.  Well, he was hot.  So yeah, not girlfriend material. 

I'm also suffering from writer's block.  Totally sucks.  I want to write crack but I've noticed that most of my ideas are really serious shit and while I want to write about it I can't seem to put it down.  Also, my mom's being all RAWR right now.  I thought her new job calmed her down a bit but I guess not really. 

I have a feeling a very big part of her mood is my fault.  *headdesk* 

I wrote some poetry, though, which I haven't done fore a very long while.  They're more personal than a lot of the stuff I've done lately and I'm wondering whether that's a good or bad thing.  I think it means that I'm being more honest/open with myself when it comes to my "art" and if that's the case then YAY!!  XDDD 

I feel like I'm growing up and that scares me sometimes.